Staying Positive

"They were the best of times, they were the worst of times..."

I think every age, era, generation can relate to this famous line.  No matter when or where you lived, you can think back throughout your life at some extraordinary moments, but also some very painful moments.  When thinking about what inspired me lately, it would have to be the idea that while these days so many people are struggling, so many beautiful things are being created.

It has been said that history is not linear.  So what does that mean? and what is history anyway.  We are taught to learn history in our social studies class while in school.  We are given a text book that is gi-nor-mous and we think there is just SO much information in there.  As we get older and gain some much needed wisdom, we understand that history is written by the winners.  Those that won the wars, those that were in the majority.  For those history writers, they were the best of times.  For the losers, the one's whose story was not told, they were the worst of times.

2009 is a perfect example of this idea.  As we know the economy is the worst it has been in atleast 20 years, the Middle East is as splintered as ever, and terrorists are always a concern.  At the same time, babies are being born, and people are getting engaged.  How can this be?  Is this the best of times or the worst of times? Can it truely be both?  If we believe that life is full of opposites then we can understand that it is necessary for there to be pain and joy all at once.  Maybe the important thing is not what is going on in the world, or in your/our life, but how we interpret these things.  

A couple of years ago I was having a hard time.  My world seemed to be crumbling and I was having panic attacks.  One day, while watching the Mets play I came accross a book called 14,000 to be Happy About.  It was simply a list (a very LOOONG list) of all things that make the author happy.  Some of them seemed silly, and some of them seemed pretty, well, happy.  That sparked an idea in my head.  I decided to write five things that make me happy every day.  The hope was that for a couple minutes a day I would stop and reflect on positive things.  Well, I started to get some of my friends to also do this, and within two weeks we had 500 "happys".  We were posting these in our emails, so I decided to create a website.  http://www.whatmakesushappy.com  was born.  What I found was that this idea was great for people who needed it, OR for those that wanted to do something fun for a short period of time.  This was not something that was being sustained by most people.  More recently, my fiancee helped me start this idea in a facebook group.  Well this group has been going fairly strong for a couple months.  

So what is the point here?  As I have taught my "kids" at work, we can never change other people, or our surroundings, but we can change ourselves, and our reactions to those people.  I just found out that I have a small speck on my back which is cancerous.  Now, I could think that this is a horrible thing, and that more bad is likely to come, or I can think that it will be taken care of and then I will do what I can to avoid it happening again.  I am leaning towards the second choice.

Life is full of ups and downs.  We all know that even at the best of times, something will happen which will threaten our joy.  I'm not going to get into the purpose of life here (thats a whole other topic) but simply, we have to be aware of this rollercoaster, and be aware that we have the opportunity to interpret events as we please.  To conclude, it is up to us whether our life is good or bad.  Exterior events do not control our happiness...only we do.

My "LOST" Theory

disclaimer: This is a theory I just came up with. I wanted to post it on here to see what people thought of it. Please comment with your own ideas, opinions for or against my theory. 

ALSO... SPOILER ALERT!!!

If you are not completely caught up on Lost do not read this!!! I would hate to ruin this for anyone that might be interested in one of the greatest shows ever on TV.

During our journey through the show LOST, we have learned that this Island is a magical place. Many instances point towards this. Here are just a couple:
1. Following the crash on the Island, Locke regained the ability to walk
2. Rose (who had cancer) had seemingly been cured since the crash
3. The man known as Richard in the "others" camp seems to have always been there and never ages.
4. (one not so magical instance) women who are pregnant normally lose their babies on the Island.
5. Jack's father continues to appear on the Island.
6. Locke's body is transported back to the island (after being murdered by Ben) where we learn that he is now alive again, and remembers being murdered.

As you know there are tons of other examples that could be used. This show has always also been about the competing viewpoints of Locke and Jack (faith vs. religion). As we are seeing in this season, the show is trying to convince us that faith is prevailing. I am here to say forget all of that. I believe that this notion of time travel answers all of the questions we have had throughout the entire show, and that it is the reason for all of these so called "mystical" aspects of the island.

If we refuse to believe that the island is magical, we could understand that the question was not where the Oceanic flight crashed, but when it crashed. I believe the airplane went back in time and crashed on the island. If that was true, it would answer why:

1. Locke was able to walk on the island because...they went back to a time BEFORE he had his accident.
2. Rose was "magically" cured because...they went back to a time BEFORE she got cancer.
3. Not sure about this one yet lol
4. Women (most of the time) lose their babies because...they go back to a time when they were not pregnant. While they still show being pregnant in the physical form, the baby has not truely been conceived yet.
5. Jack's father is on the island because...his body was transported to the island on the plane. When they went back in time, they went back to a time when he was still alive.
6. The same is true for Locke, who appeared alive on the island although he was dead in LA. They traveled BACK in time to a period before he was murdered.

Now obviously there are some flaws and somethings I have not figured out yet. Let me know what you think. Does this make sense? Do you know of other instances that make this theory work or not work? Let me know.

The Hero (part 2)

While there have been many wonderful changes in my life over the past couple of weeks, there is no time to be complacent.  I have been stalled in writing my next piece as I have been trying to find the perfect topic.  I have searched my mental rolladex and decided to avoid writing this time around about PS3 games, the Mets first days at camp, my love for progress, and last but not least my heart, my fiancee.  

I am in the process of reading Joseph Campbell's The Hero With A Thousand Faces.  The idea of the hero has always fascinated me, and I know I am not the only one.  I think all of us dream of being the one, the person who can transcend much of what is life and become victorious at whatever we put our heart into.  We are all drawn to these stories which have been written and spoken from the beginning of time.  Whether it be Gilgamesh, Odysseus, Luke Skywalker, Batman, or even Jesus, these are figures that transcend time because the concept transcends time.  No matter the packaging, the hero remains in the same form.  

I am not here to give a history lesson on the Hero and the different stages of the rites of passage.  I would like to briefly speak about the importance of the hero.  The idea that life is but a series of opposites can be seen in most religions, maybe most notably in the form of the Chinese Yin and Yang.  Good and bad, comed and tradegy, truth and false, love and hate.  They say there is a thin line between love and hate, and that stands true for all of these opposites.  It is that thin line that all of us humans are always balancing.  There is rarely incidents that can be labeled "black and white" and most seem to turn out in that "grey" area.  

So what is the (over-simplified) version of the difference between the hero and the rest of us?  Joseph Campbell writes that the difference comes at the point when the hero transcends these opposites and acquires true insight.  Most of us cannot see beyond our own egocentrism.  For example, Our sense of nationalism blinds our interpretation of moral right and wrong.  We believe that our country (most of the time) is morally right, while the other side is always wrong.  The hero has been touched by the supreme being (whatever that is for you) and has a true sense of insight.  

Campbell further explains that at this point the hero understands all that there is to know, and realizes that it was always within (him/her).  This is a point that I first understood coming from Mr. Nasir Jones in the Street Dreams Remix song.  Nas raps, "and the only thing I found incredible, Everything I tried to learn see, I already knew". The idea that our souls, being a part of the whole of everything must spend a lifetime attempting to "re-learn" the meaning of everything.  

The hero is what many of us aspire to be. while some of us just float through the days trying to get by and stay blinded, the rest of us desire to know more, and be more. The idea of the hero is a template for how we would like to live our lives, striving to always be better and to leave the most positive mark on people, and this world possible.

Steroids vs. the Bong

Once again news about Athletes and drugs is surfacing. Hours after the Steelers "stole" (with one foot down) the Super Bowl, CNN's headlines read about sports, but not the football kind. Phelps' apology about a picture that surfaced of him smoking out of a blunt seemed to be more important than "six"burgh. Not more than two days later The judge in the Barry "barroid" Bonds case was deciding whether or not to unseal evidence that Bonds failed a drug test in 2003.

No matter the sport, the media, and public seems to be fascinated by the drug use of our modern "heros". This discussion is centered on the differences between athletes using drugs for recreational use, and athletes using drugs for the purpose of getting an edge.

Most people who know me (or atleast have seen me with my throwback jersey on) know that Dwight "Doc" Gooden is my favorite baseball player of all time. (Although Reyes is coming on fast!) Last week ex-Met employee (and known rat) Radomski stated that he took a urine sample for many players including Doc. Gooden responded through text by saying "LOL". Now, we all know that Gooden has struggled with drug use. Coke was the drug of choice of that championship team of ours in 86' and Gooden was one of the victims. His drug ultimately signaled the end of his career. THIS we know. Gooden was never accused of steroid use until now.

What do Michael Phelps and Dwight Gooden have in common? They enjoyed getting high. What do Barry Bonds and Marion Jones have in common? they both used drugs to get an upper hand over their competition. So what is the difference? Are all drug users/abusers the same? This is a question that does not have an easy answer.

When I first heard the accusation that Gooden had used steroids my heart sunk. While I knew he was a junkie, I could live with that. I could still wear his jersey and be proud. No matter what, he was still one of the greatest talents to ever step on the mound. But, if it was true that Gooden's talent wasn't truely his own, that he was a fraud, that he was only named Dr. K because of something he put in his ass, then everything I ever felt about him would change.

I believe that we respect athletes because of what they can do on the court, the field, the swimming pool. If they want to get a little high in their off time, I'm ok with that. As long as I know that they are not cheating and their ability is true, I am ok with that.

O' Fred, Where Art Thou?

I first want to put a plug in for everyone (all 3 of you!) to check out my friend's blog.  http://silentarchimedes.wordpress.com/ It is a truely amazing site with strong analysis built into every blog written.  He has written a blog analyzing what NY team combinations have the highest success rates in the past 25 years.

  http://silentarchimedes.wordpress.com/2009/01/01/being-a-sports-fan-in-new-york-city-what-team-combinations-have-had-the-most-success-the-past-25-years/  

I bring this up for everyone to read but to highlight the fact that it's not easy being a Mets fan.  I will say that it takes more heart and passion to be a Mets fan than say a Yankees fan (esp. for us 35 and youngers).  It is very easy to support a team who always seems to be on top through the use of spending as much money as possible year in and year out.  Being a fan of a team that has let you down year in and out shows true loyalty and passion (not to mention idiocity!)  With that said, this is part one of many blogs I will write about my beloved Metties:

So, today is January 25, 2009 and Mets fans and many members of the press are getting ansy.  We have endured two years of huge disappointments and with the new stadium (CitiField) on the horrizon, we are hoping for a fresh start.  The Off season started with a bang with the trade that brought J.J. Putz (and got rid of Heilman) and the signing of K-Rod.  Since then rumors, have been floating, free agents have been signing, and the Mets have nothing of real substance (Alex Cora, Freddy Garcia, Tim Redding?) to show for it.  As fans we have our dream team.  And I think most fans will all agree what we would like to see done in a perfect world.  Lets sign Perez and Sheets for the starting rotation, Manny for Left field, trade Castillo and sign Hudson for second.  Now, is that too much to ask?  But then we are brought down to reality and we know that all those players are not in our horrizon.  

The frustration comes when we know that we have holes on the team.  The bullpen was improved drastically, we all agree.  We sit here watching the Yankees and other teams improving their teams and fixing what problems they know they have.  We have grown to like the art of spending also, esp. being in this market, and we do not understand why our management will not just spend or trade to make this team right.  The the question is, what is really going on?  I love when I listen to WFAN and hear analysis of why the Mets arent spending to get the players we know they should.  It is Fred's decision, it is Omar's decision, Maddoff really hurt our financial abilities, the Mets are just waiting for the market to come to them, etc.  Will we ever really understand why the Mets are faltering this off season?  Probably not.  The days are dwindling down to when Pitchers and Catchers meet and all we know is that our dream acquisitons are still available for the taking.  It is no secret that players such as Hudson and Manny are waiting for something to sign.  Are they waiting for a team like the Mets to get in the mix?  Are they holding their breath just like us fans are?  As Matt Cerrone wrote today:

http://www.metsblog.com/2009/01/25/outfield-the-talk-about-manny-ramirez/

fans recently are speaking out more and more on Manny and why he NEEDS to be in Queens.  Overall, we will all be happy as long as the outcome is what we want to see, the World Series.  Mets fans will play the role of Martyr and complain (maybe thats why so many of us Jews in the area are mets fans!) until that day comes.

So I end this with a plea to the Wilpons and Omar.  PLEASE OH PLEASE don't sit still.  You will make tons of money with the new park when all is said and done.  Lets improve this team now and not watch as our competitors take more steps ahead of us.  Bring Manny, Hudson, Perez, and Sheets to us!!!  Nothing short of the World Series will do, we have hurt for too long!!  

Service

This historic day has seem much analysis and praise.  Many words have been thrown around attempting to describe what this day means for this country, African Americans, you, me, etc.  I would like to talk about one word in particular that I find extremely important.  Service.  

It is no secret that Obama has been a strong advocate for service.  He has expressed that numerous times during the election and post-election process.  His support for organizations that I belong to (YouthBuild, AmeriCorps) show the direction he would like to see this country go in.  But, what does service really mean?  

Obama, during his inaugural speech, defined service as a "willingness to find meaning in something greater then themselves".  To me this was a defining moment of his speech and one that speaks loudly to all American's today.  My last blog was focused on the Me-First generation.  The theory that these past couple of generations are too worried about their own feelings, self-esteem and issues to show enough concern for their fellow people and communities.  What we have today is a generation of people that think first about their own needs and wants and being happy, placing the concerns of the whole behind (if even considering at all).  Our communities have become distant shells of what they once were, our middle class has disappeared, our poor have seen better days, and WE ALL feel someone owes US.  Illegal immigrants have an easier time finding jobs because they are willing to work as opposed to US citizens who refuse to work at less respectable locations because they are WORTH MORE.  Our parents cannot find the time to parent, and when they do, live vicariously through the children by enrolling them in activities that make themselves (the parent) feel good.  These examples all demonstrate how America has become a country/culture of people more focused on themselves.  

Obama wants us to realize that for America to once again regain its footing and climb out of these difficult times we must believe in something greater than ourselves.  How can WE give back, how can WE help, how are WE going to overcome.  I see many people throwing the world hope around.  This is rightfully so as Obama has used this as a platform for his election and then after.  Hope entails of better days to come, which we all would like to see, but it also entails a passive mentaility.  Obama is strongly against this.

On his track Champion Requiem, Mos Def raps, "I was taught when there's something you can change around, keep quiet, you got nothing to complain about, you got work to do, I don't know if that works for you, but thats how Mos works it through...".  To me Obama is reiterating this idea.  Lets not find hope in the future, lets make this new future together.  Lets roll up our sleeves (as he did on the election trail - very symbolic) and get busy together.  I can not fix this, you can not fix this, but together we can make a change.  

No matter what your job is, Obama is imploring US to fulfill your duty of service and help make this country even greater.  How can WE help in our families, in our communities, in our inner circles, in our outer circles?  How can we give back, whether large or small to make a difference.  How can WE find meaning and reasoning in something greater than our own needs, wants and desires?

How will Obama do during his presidency?  If you want to know listen to Mos Def's (once again) explanation of the future direction of Hiphop on his intro track to Black on both Sides.  Mos explains that Hiphop will go where the people go.  This country will go where its citizens go.  Obama will succeed or fail as the people succeed or fail.  So, let's not just hope for change, lets be that change that we want to see in this country.   

The "me first" generation (Part 1)

During today's broadcast of the (horrible) Giants and Eagles game the announcers mentioned Plaxico Burress (who's absence, by the way was the cause of our defeat) as a member of the "me first" generation.  While this is a term that I have not yet heard until now, it is a topic that comes up over and over again.  I would like to begin to disect this idea since it is close to my heart for many reasons.

As I have investigated further, this idea of Generation ME is a combination of GenX and GenY (aprox. 18-35year olds).  [we] have been taught to be more focused on our own self-esteem rather than achievement, thus more focused on ourselves.  I do not want to argue for or against this at this point, rather investigate the idea and how it is relevant.  

It has been well documented that the 1980's economic boom coupled with the start of the MTV era created a generation that was well off and desired instant gratification.  The fast pace of music videos taught young people to not wait for the long drawn out boring parts, but just expect the fast action right away.  Everything seems to be expected and owed to [us].

As cited in the book    "Generation Me: Why Today's Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled--and More Miserable Than Ever Before" by Jean Twenge, discipline and achievement have been pushed aside for a stronger focus on self-esteem.  Let Johnny play even if he sucks instead of letting him sit on the sidelines because he is not good enough for the team.  To further this position in sports, one could compare the sport of baseball and how it is played in the United States to that in Japan.  As we know, while we root for our favorite teams here in the U.S., we have a strong focus on individual players.  Our athletes make millions of dollars and it is common place for a player to leave a team he has been on for a long time to follow the money with another team.  The game is very different in Japan.  There is nothing that comes before the team.  Individuality takes a backseat to your team.  The phrase "there is no I in team," is very true.  

We hear story after story of these players.  Plaxico Burress is one in a long list of players who supposedly acted foolishly off the field without a regard for how it would affect his team, teammates, fans, city, family, etc.  These players normally are extremely skilled and on most occasion have grown up being told that they were the best and no one else compares to them.  

This analogy can also be taken to Hiphop.  As I have discussed over and over again, Hiphop is a microcosm to the larger urban culture as well as the larger pop American culture today.  many of the issues that Hiphop faces we can find in the urban arena as well as in the U.S. as a whole.  One prevelant theme is the "me first" mentality.  One must gain respect for themselves and destroy other rappers (lyrically) to be number 1.  It is all about who is better and how can I beat YOU.  

This can also translate to the kids that I work with.  Instead of always being thankful for the things that they are given at the school, they feel that they are owed these things and take it all for granted.  What can we do for them, and how can they get the best of the system are over riding themes.  

If this is all true, then what could be done, and what changes have taken place over the years to create this mentality?  Is this mentality bad?  Are we too consumed with ourselves that we tend not to care about others?  Is that bad?  What are the results of this attitude?  If you have any thoughts, please feel free to post, I will continue this discussion attack this issue further at a later date...I'm getting sleepy...